Hey Sadie-a week ago you were here at home and we thought it would be for a long time. It was so amazing to have you here again where you belong. I just wanted you to know that I love you tonight-and always.
Talked to the vet today and got the results from the biopsy back finally from the tumor-yep cancer. She thinks that it was there a year ago when we took you in for the constant stopping to pee that had been going on for a couple of months. She said that it would have spread very soon, if it hadn’t already. We didn’t want that kind of pain or suffering ever for you, darling. We would rather have the pain we have in missing you-pretty much agony, actually, nowadays. But now we know that it was the thing that needed to happen-we just hate that.
We are going to have a wake for you, Sade, at one of your favorite places-the bar at the beach across the street. Everyone is bringing their dogs. I will listen for your barking-I miss that so much! The screen door we bought for you finally arrived and was installed today, and I like to think that you will be lying in front of it to catch the evening breeze. The kitties are freaked out by it, for some reason.
It’s late, and I just had to stop to tell you that we really loved having you in our lives every day. I realized today that you and I were together almost every hour of the day each week-maybe 3-4 hours away from you to do grocery shopping or a doctors appointment most weeks, and then usually Tim would be with you. I just loved you with me everywhere. Some of the advice in books for getting through the first weeks of loss say that at first, you should change your patterns of doing things that you did with your darling to keep from the constant sense of “you are not here.” Sadie, we went everywhere together-it is impossible for me to follow that advice. And I guess I am glad, because it was wonderful to be with you-at work, at stores, in the car singing with me.
Please keep being with me everywhere, OK? Even now, I can feel the sensation of reaching over and running my hand on your back and ruffling your fur-happiness for me, darling. I love you Sadie. None like you, girl.
Night love.
Remembering Sadie 